Business travel
Ninjas
Can a ninja get through airport security?
Dec 27th 2011, 19:50 by N.B. | WASHINGTON, D.C.
AMERICA'S airport security agency, the Transportation Security Adminstration, claims to have caught a ninja trying to slip through airport security. Well, not exactly, despite the title of the agency's celebratory blog post, "Not Even Ninjas Can Evade Airport Security." Here's what really happened: a passenger who was trying to fly to Chicago brought with him a book called "Ninja: The Shadow Warrior", the inside of which had been hollowed out to hold what appear to be some pretty serious ninja knives:
I did a little research and it doesn't seem as though this book was designed to contain knives—the passenger presumably hollowed it out himself. Is that really something you forget you did? The TSA does miss things, but a ninja book containing knives would have raised all sorts of red flags. More important, though, is that it's not very ninja-like to hide your ninja knives in your ninja book. Last time I checked, ninjas aren't supposed to draw attention to themselves. Ninjas definitely aren't supposed to "voluntarily surrender" their weapons, as this one did when confronted by airport security. It sounds like someone needs a refresher course.
The TSA's Blogger Bob, who now has a last name, Burns, admits that the agency "didn’t catch an actual Ninja," but what they "did catch was a passenger who claimed they forgot this stealthy Ninja book was in their bag. Hmmm...." Hmmm indeed.
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Readers' comments
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aren't Ninja's hands lethal weapons.....?
If only he'd read the book rather than hollowed it out immediately...
Fearmongering at its sleaziest! Keep the gullible, paranoid & ignorant American masses in their ongoing hysterical mode, so they lose sight of the 'real' problems besetting their floundering nation. What a grotesque fiasco!
A real ninja would have snuck onto the plane without going through security or buying a ticket.
Speaking of Bruce Lee. ... These amateurs should have spend some time,watching the ip man movies and learning the 1" strike from Wing Chun. =)) Donnie learned it in 8 months. =)) ...
This is hilarious. Aren't ninjas supposed to have good memory?
"It sounds like someone needs a refresher course."
I find this article misleading, suggesting that the blog post author actually thought they caught a ninja.
After reading the blog post, the author made it quite clear that they understood he wasn't an actual ninja.
A real ninja would know that metal knives in a paper book stand out on an X-ray like Andre the Giant in a Bolivian village.
Time to put the NDAA to use right away.
Well, obviously the reason this ninja was caught was because he was actually part of a large party of many ninjas. As everyone knows, the Conservation of Ninjitsu states that gross individual competency is evenly divided among all present individuals. After he was caught, the group size fell by one, and the individual competency of the other ninja rose just enough for the rest of them to get through undetected.
Maybe the real ninja actually slipped through and this unfortunate trainee was an elaborate decoy used to distract the TSA. I guess the trainee forgot to pack his smoke bombs....
Real ninjas would go about setting up a network of collaborators within FedEx or DHL so that his/her gears could be transported across any border with impunity...
Maybe the ninja wannabe was trying to use reverse psychology: "nobody will ever think that my book about ninjas actually has a pair of daggers secreted inside; it would be TOO OBVIOUS!"
I travel everywhere with my turtle, and have never been stopped.
"More important, though, is that it's not very ninja-like to hide your ninja knives in your ninja book. Last time I checked, ninjas aren't supposed to draw attention to themselves. Ninjas definitely aren't supposed to "voluntarily surrender" their weapons, as this one did when confronted by airport security. It sounds like someone needs a refresher course."
LOL No, that does not sound like a real ninja.
Clearly, the ninja was descended from one of these:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMlu7ZleclI
Terrorists try to get through security.
They romanticize themselves as Ninja Samurai Assassins.
Unfortunately they have neither the skill or tradition of the Samurai. They employ dummy fail/safe switches on a suicide vest and even then, more than half fail. One had a paper fuse protruding through his shoe toe box. It got wet and he failed to light it.
Ossama bin Ladin liked Bruce Lee films.....which just shows even International Evil-Genius Masterminds need to watch entertaining, action-adventure movies on Saturday night.
You do have the odd stupid ninja every now and again, only...seldom.